Stop and Stare at the Emptiness

Lately, I was busy with many stuff, chores and shits of workload. No time to take a rest and settle down. With my birthday just passed, Christmas and New Year just around the corner, it has been a freaking busy weeks for me. HHTHJM already whining at me to update my blog coz my blog as be collecting many many dusts. Sorry HHTHJM, lately dunno why so lazy!!! So today I plan to clear all back dated posts. Kudos for me!!!

Sunday, a day I rest and do my stuff. Have some privacy and alone session with my inner self. Actually it is was day where my ass was damn fucking lazy. It did not want to move even I fart at it!!! Damn it, ass!!! You better get yourself together before I spank you hard!!! Bondage style!!! Wakakaka!!! Yeah I was lazy, I become a potato couch. I was trying to cleared all my movie that I have downloaded but did not took the time to sit down and watch it. But I did!!! I finished my favorite 1 hour Victoria Secret Fashion Show 2007, Superbad, Knocked Up, Mr.Woodcock, Shoot Em Up and lastly Jackass 2.5!!! Yeah 5 movies, keng mou!!! I love cooking my movies!!! And it is time for blogging!!! Happy now HHJHTM?? Hahahaha!!!

EMPTINESS!!! A freaking word that have lingering in my pea brain for long time. But today seems it kept pounding on my skull. Maybe I was doing nothing and thinking nonsense and the unnecessary!!! I think I moving but actually I not, nowhere. The chilling and lonesome feeling is so gross and real. SCREW IT and FUCK IT UPSIDE DOWN!!! Lately I been with her often and got this stupid idea that I had a chance with her. But I know I don't. Yeah, never give up attitude!!! GAMBATTE!!! Hahaha... I don't want to scare her or worst became a nobody to her. She had some rough time lately, I know, I understand. But I won't take the opportunity to get her. It will be sick although my other half insists. Jeezz... I just want be there for her and care about her happiness, that's all. As a friend would do. Anyway, I fall in love with song from One Republic. It really suits my mood now. Read the lyrics. Quite meaning and partially describe my emotion now. ENJOY IT.

Artist: One Republic
Song: Stop and Stare

This town is colder now, I think it's sick of us
It's time to make our move, I'm shakin off the rust
I've got my heart set on anywhere but here
I'm staring down myself, counting up the years
Steady hands, just take the wheel...
And every glance is killing me
Time to make one last appeal... for the life I lead

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be, oh
Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're 'here' not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need
Oh, can u see what I see

They're tryin to come back, all my senses push
Un-tie the weight bags, I never thought I could...
Steady feet, don't fail me now
Gonna run till you can't walk
But something pulls my focus out
And I'm standing down...

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be, oh
Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're here not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need
Oh, you don't need

What u need, what u need...

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be
Oh, do u see what I see...